November 14, 2004


my house is my cage
I have swallowed the key
steel box for my rage
did it purposefully

locked from the inside
keep me away from things that breathe
my own clean Eden
filled with greys and slow motion


I sit in the corner
turn off all the lights
and close my eyes
make it even darker

my hands are cold
but they don't have to be
silently naked
still and tensely

I make myself
small as I can be
it's safer that way
maybe they won't see

I try to stop my brain
from hurting me
torture and dynasty
flat hands, green incredulity


I stare at the phone
my knees to my chest
I stare at the wall
and nothing happens at all

I want to scream
there's nothing louder than me
to drown my hesitation
the thoughts critically


this air I breathe
sealed by Hermes
has been in and out of my body
hundreds of times

dropping off its oxygen
little by little
like messengers from the Kuyper belt
delivering tiny reddening pearls

I want to be the smoke
that climbs my chimney
blue gray and dancing
up up and out

I send it; a signal
dissipating in the crystalline air
before my neighbors can see
something's glowing inside


this song is written
for those of you who listen
you see the patterns
in the disintegration of logs


listen to 'swallowed'

Posted by halsey at November 14, 2004 09:24 AM

Thanks so much for posting these lyrics. 'Swallowed' remains one of my absolute favorites among all of your songs, including the EOE stuff. There's something about the pulse, the heartbeat of it, that makes it so captivating and absorbing. The musical composition, with its complex layers melding together just right, is awesome. That said, I still think the lyrics steal the show.

I hope you'll continue to showcase your talents with poetry/lyrics as you move forward with the Words & Voices project (as you did particularly well in 'leaf" and 'imposters of memory'). Yes, you are a musician... but you're also a talented writer. Don't ever give us a chance to forget.

Posted by: Twiga at November 14, 2004 04:40 PM

ms. twiga-
you see the patterns in the disintegration of logs better than anyone...
thank you.

Posted by: halsey at November 15, 2004 08:45 AM

Thanks for giving me the words to your song. I read it and wondered how did you know how I feel? You are indeed good. But I have to say that I feel like that a little less each day. I am so glad.

Posted by: dudek at November 15, 2004 05:13 PM
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